Shaitan

------------
Note 1: I failed to see what the audiences and the reviewers are so excited about for this movie. I usually avoid negative reviews, but again, like 'Raajneeti', I just had to write this one.

Note 2: I am sure a lot of people would disagree with me. If you are willing to spend your time, I would love to hear your opinion in the comments.
------------

When you come to know about a movie that will be releasing shortly, and you scrutinize the promotional poster carefully, and see the name 'Anurag Kashyap' printed on the poster, you get excited about it. You eagerly wait for the movie. You are excited for you don't know how the maestro will surprise you this time. It doesn't matter in what capacity is he associated with the movie, his name is enough for creating the buzz. So far so good.

Now, I came to know about 'Shaitan' a couple of months back, and naturally, I was excited about it. I saw the poster, and truly, the poster was remarkable. Then, something happened. Something ominous. Now, I haven't seen the movie 'Kaboom', and have no idea what that movie is about, but the striking resemblance of the posters seriously pissed me off.




Now, there is a specific genre of movies called "Mindfuck". In a good way. [define:Mindfuck - An idea or concept that shakes one's previously held beliefs or assumptions about the nature of reality. (Urban Dictionary)]. When an Anurag Kashyap production has this tagline - "Face your Inner Shaitan", that is precisely what you expect. You know, like 'Black Swan'. Or even 'Gulaal', Anurag's last directorial venture. NOT, to get your mind fucked by an amateurish attempt.

There is no underlying prominent theme in the movie. That should have been there. There is NO power-packed acting performance. That should have been there. There is no empathy (or sympathy, for that matter) the audience feels for any of the characters. That should have been there. There is little or no surprise element in the movie. That should have been there. The only thing that should have been there and is there in the movie is the excellent cinematography.

When dealing with a subject as complex as 'inner conflict' and the dilemma, the characterization should be spot-on. We should be able to understand a character. What it does, and why it does what it does. It should come down to two simple things - reason, and purpose. And that is where this movie fails so spectacularly.

The movie is only brilliant in parts, and those parts are very few and far apart in the movie. I really really expected a lot more out of this venture, and probably that is the reason I am so disappointed. What pains me is that the intended idea was so powerful, that they could have made a masterpiece out of it. But they ended up making it one big mess. Towards the end, the movie is just noise. Annoying, disappointing, noise. The plot holes in the movie are so many that I can't find the patience to sit and write about each one of them, and tear it apart one at a time.

Watch this one only to see how even a genius can make a bad bet.

Shaitan...

Chance

When I was in school, I used to particularly enjoy my English classes, only because of the teachers we had. Incidentally, they were probably one of the best teachers I have ever had. One of our teachers kept on reminding us, "You come here to study the King's English. Don't ruin it with your Hin-glish and all the other nonsense you people blabber all day. At least not here inside the classroom." And it was the teaching which got us all interested in grammar. We came to appreciate the beauty of language.

There was a particular section of grammar which interested me a lot. Homonyms. A Homonym, according to the Wikipedia, is "one of a group of words that share the same spelling and the same pronunciation but have different meanings." Now, in a typical class on Homonyms, our teacher would fire words at the class, and the students had to come up with sentences to bring out multiple meanings of the words. This exercise, you know, really made us think of all the different possibilities with the word. We used common words in ways that surprised us. When I think about it now, it is amazing how our teacher made us get kicks from language, similar to how we would later get when we solved a complex differential equation. Over time, this developed into a deep sense of appreciation for puns, play on words, and probably an improved sense of humour. Like, you know, it made you appreciate sentences like - "Whoever came up with 'The grapes are sour.' probably had a lot of whine.", or, a comic like this:

So, I remember this particular English class on Homonyms from when I was in class 7. Our teacher fired words at us and we shot back with crisp sentences. 'Scale', came the word. "I used my scale to measure the width of the table.", came a prompt response. Then, the class was lost for another meaning. I saw my opportunity, and blurted, "I want to scale the Mt. Everest." You know that smug feeling you get, when you get extra credit for doing something others couldn't. My face shone! When the feeling had subsided, I got thinking about how brilliant my answer was, and realized, although my answer had been deemed "correct", it wasn't really correct in the truest sense. If you think about it from a broad perspective, scaling the Mt. Everest is as good as measuring its height, as if with an actual scale! Soon, I found myself trying more and more to unify the meanings of Homonyms I came across.

It makes perfect sense, you know. When you witness a live concert, you are actually living it (different pronunciations, I know). Or, that a minute is really a minute unit of time (again, pronunciation). Or, that a project is a project-ion of ideas. And that refuse is something which you refuse to have inside your house. There is an interesting anecdote about how the expression "breaking the record" came into use (the Homonym here being, of course, record). In olden days, people used to literally "break" the records engraved on stone tablets when someone bettered it...

... all of which brings me to chance. When we look back on our lives, we find how much of it was really based on chance. Chances we took, chances we got. Chances we gave, taking chances on something. On how many times we took chances on all the chances life gave us. On how we messed up some of the chances we got by taking an unreasonable chance. And that there was always a chance for the things that went right for us to go equally wrong. And when we look ahead into the future of our lives, and try to "plan" it, how we want one chance, just one chance, to turn our lives around! Or get another chance to make things right, which, it so chanced that it didn't go well the last time. You know, given a set of circumstances and understanding, we take a chance on the best possible chance we get, even when chances of success look grim.

Chances are, Life will give you another chance, you just have to wait long enough, you will know when you get it. Or, if you have waited long enough, you'll know how to create one for yourself. Aur jab tak mauka naa mile, tab tak mocha se kaam chalaa lenge!

Shor in the City

------------
Note 1: I haven't blogged recently. Either because I did not come across something inspiring to write about. OR, because I have been writing for a very (very) small audience lately. Not that anyone missed it, so that's alright.

Note 2: I have wasted atleast 1500-2000 bucks watching a load of crap lately. Dum Maaro Dum, No-one killed Jessica, 7 Khoon Maaf, Yeh Saali Zindagi. ALL bakvaas. Different degrees of bakvaas-ness, I agree, but bakvaas. Kya bakvaas! 'Shor in the City' is surprisingly fresh!
------------

I had almost decided to NOT blog about this movie, until the end credits of 'Shor in the City' started rolling. And then, what I saw on-screen made me want to blog about it. Why? I am sure I am not letting out a major spoiler by telling you what that is, and I'll tell you what it is in this post. We'll come to that later.

With bollywood on a we'll-dish-out-whatever-nonsense-and-people-will-pay-to-watch-it spree lately, I was about to skip this one, had it not been for my listening to the movie's soundtrack, which is stunning!

...Nainaa nawaabi ji, dekhe hai sab ji;

Phir bhi na samjhe ishaare

Dheere dheere, naino mai dheere dheere;

Apna sa dheere dheere, laage re saibo...

When people ask me how I found a particular hindi movie, I try to think about the movie till the interval, and if the movie is watchable till the interval, I recommend the movie as watchable. Because mostly thats what you get here. At best, a watchable first-half. 'Shor in the city', surprisingly, doesn't lose its charm even in the second half of the movie, and full points to the directors for not letting the movie lose its pace throughout.

The characters are engaging, and the actors have been very balanced in their portrayal of their characters. Sendhil Ramamurthy (of Heroes fame), Nikhil Dwivedi, Sundeep Kishan have all done very good work. I was charmed by Girija Oak after 'Taare Zameen Par'. She does well, but the new find of this movie is definitely the charming Radhika Apte.

All said and done, the show-stealer is Pitobash Tripathi. Wow! That guy! I haven't had my tummy hurting laughing my ass off to some scene in an Indian movie in a very very long time, and this guy doesn't deliver just one scene, he delivers it again, and again, and again. Especially the scene where the trio go out to "try and see" if the bomb they found makes some noise and damage because it won't "sell" in the market. Superb!

I find a major flaw in the way movie-making is done in India. Indians want a story. It has to have a beginning, it has to have an end, and it has to have some events in between. That Indian movies often end up without a story and always in ways the director did not intend is a different story altogether. Where is the slice-of-life film-making in India?

Several minutes into the movie, I got wondering - "There is no clear-cut story, and I am engrossed!" THAT is the power of writing. And although you may find the movie in bits and pieces scattered here and there, with outrageously hilarious writing, the writer does well to knit it all in the end. And let me reveal what I saw on-screen which made me want to stand up and applaud for the directors and the writers of this movie.

"Every incident depicted in this movie has been inspired by a real newspaper story."

Watch it!

Shor in the City...

Black Swan

------------
Note 1: Finally! :) Watch it on the big screen. Please.

Note 2: I write this post for princess!
------------

Black Swan. I can talk about this extra-ordinary piece of cinema on so many different levels. Let me begin with my agonizing wait, anticipation, excitement, temptation to watch it on the small screen, some more agonizing wait, and finally, it hitting Indian theaters in March, after it had been going on around the world for almost 6 months. Was the wait to watch this movie in its full glory and magnificence on a larger-than-life silver screen worth it? Hell yeah!

Natalie Portman has managed to blow my mind and overwhelm me on more than one occasions - V for Vendetta, Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Leon: The Professional. With Black Swan, she took it to a whole new level. This year's Oscar nominee list for the Best Actress should have had just one name on the list. Natalie Portman. If not the greatest, her surreal performance is definitely among the greatest performances by any actress, ever. Natalie! ♥

Nina: I just want to be perfect.

Requiem for a Dream was about obsession. Black Swan is about obsession for perfection. We have all experienced it at some level, in some form or other. And have felt it destroying us, slowly, from inside. And this destruction is not destructive, its an exploration, of you. You cannot stop it, you eventually let go, and maybe achieve (perfection), but at what price? Perhaps, the pursuit of perfection is meant to persist, and people, persistent. Perhaps.

The hand-held camera work gives an ethereal quality to the footage. The scenes are picturised perfectly. The use of mirrors is overwhelming. The climax, when Nina is dominated by her dark side, and she transformed into a (black) swan is absolutely brilliant!

Thomas Leroy: Perfection is not just about control. It's also about letting go. Surprise yourself, so you can surprise the audience. The only person standing in your way is you. You could be brilliant, but you're a coward.

Natalie shines playing Nina's quest for perfection as a ballerina. To be truly complete. The frustration, in being the perfect white swan, but a frigid and stiff black swan.

Thomas Leroy: We all know the story. Virginal girl, pure and sweet, trapped in the body of a swan. She desires freedom but only true love can break the spell. Her wish is nearly granted in the form of a prince, but before he can declare his love, her lustful twin, the black swan, tricks and seduces him. Devastated the white swan leaps of a cliff killing herself and, in death, finds freedom.

The Perseverance. To let go. The Greed. To be perfect. The Envy. Of another flawless black swan in front of her eyes. The Wrath. Of failing. The Lust. Of the enemy. The Sloth. In her performance. and The Pride. Of perfection.

Thomas Leroy: Little princess...

Nina: I felt it. Perfect. I was perfect.

Black Swan...

Coyote (and love)

------------
Note 1: This is what I was doing on last Valentine's Day. I know, sad.

Note 2: This is what I am doing on this Valentine's Day. I know, sad(der).
------------

Coyote and Road Runner. Awesome, right! :D

I know, we all loved how Coyote's grand plans failed to capture Road Runner, and the joy we got when Road Runner went "Beep! Beep!" and vanished! And even more when Coyote just knew that it was over for him, and did not resist the situation, and went down, just like that, with a blank expression! :D

BUT, it got weird over time. Its like it is narrating our life's story. And no, we are not Road Runner, we are Coyote. :| How?


There are certain Laws and Rules which goes on in the background -


1. Road Runner cannot harm Coyote except by going "beep, beep."

one. Yup, a girl cannot harm us except by going "beep, beep.". (not counting the "thadaaaak!" sound the slap makes). That's enough damage for us anyway.


2. No outside force can harm the Coyote — only his own ineptitude or failure.

two. LOL. Our own ineptitude and failure is enough. Outside forces enter sometimes, when the girl has a boyfriend, or a disproportionately huge brother.


3. The Coyote could stop anytime — IF he were not a fanatic.

three. Fanatic? :| Romantic, you mean?


4. No dialogue ever, except "beep, beep" and yowling in pain.

four. Haha, that depends on whether we have got anything else that we can say, and yes, mostly, we don't.


5. Road Runner must stay on the road — for no other reason than that he's a roadrunner.

five. So now we know where to look?


6. All action must be confined to the natural environment of the two characters.

six. Natural environment. Hmmm. I am pretty sure we need an unnatural environment for ourselves. Ohk, THAT makes it a catch 22. :|


7. All tools, weapons, or mechanical conveniences must be obtained from the Acme Corporation.

seven. I see. And where is Acme Corporation?


8. Whenever possible, make gravity the Coyote's greatest enemy.

eight. Gravity (or, lack thereof) IS our greatest enemy! :D


9. The Coyote is always more humiliated than harmed by his failures.

nine. Like I am (would be), after I am done with this post. Or, in a general case, you get the sense.


10. The audience's sympathy must remain with the Coyote.

ten. Yes, mutual sympathy in our brotherhood is what has been making us to keep going. Sometimes we are Coyote, sometimes the audience, but sympathy shall remain.


11. The Coyote is not allowed to catch the road runner.

eleven. Please change this. Please! Allow? Why do we need allow(ance)? We should have that by default, right? Or maybe we are not. And hence the predicament. Blah.


Some light entertainment after a (majorly) boring post...




Happy Valentine's Day! :)

Coyote (and love)...

Proud to be an Indian

------------
Note 1: "Ab bhi jiska khoon naa khaula, khoon nahi wo paani hai; jo desh ke kaam naa aaye, wo bekaar jawaani hai"

Note 2: Happy Republic Day.
------------

Proud to be an Indian

For those of you who didn't spot it, I'll spell it out. The sentence above, it lacks a punctuation mark at the end. 'Proud to be an Indian.' would mean that I am proud to be an Indian. 'Proud to be an Indian!' would mean that I am excited in being proud to be an Indian. 'Proud to be an Indian?' would be a question to people reading it (or, to myself) whether they are (or, I am) really proud to be an Indian. Honestly, I don't know, and hence, no use of a punctuation mark.

There is a disease rampant in India. That disease is called talk-big-ideals-and-philosophies-on-independence-day-and-republic-day-and-don't-give-a-fuck-any-other-day. No problem with that though, freedom of expression, right? Also, the fact that I am writing this on Republic Day would mean that I have this disease too (mild, maybe?). But then, freedom of expression, right?

Having said that, I will not rant about onions being dearer than petrol, or how illiteracy and corruption is destroying this country inside out, or how a common man has to fight each and every day of his life in this country to make ends meet, and then conclude 'kuch nahi ho sakta'. Nope. Not today. Nor will I brag about the rich culture, heritage and diversity we have in our country, nor how A. R. Rahman has taken India on to a global arena, nor how this country has ushered into the new millennium with a bang and might be on the road to become a super-power, nor how each ton that Sachin Tendulkar produces fills the heart of each Indian with patriotism, nor how Saina Nehwal became world No. 1 and made our country proud, nor how things are really changing and that there is hope for each of us, and then conclude how lucky I am to be born in this country and go 'Jai Hind!'. Nope. Not today.

As an extremely common man of this country, I would, though, like to mention one single observation, which, personally, triggers a thought-process in me about me and my Indian-ness every time it happens.

Ever been to watch a movie at a theater/multiplex, after spending a couple of hundred bucks, with a tub of cheese-popcorn? No sooner have you taken your comfortable seat than the message would flash - "Please rise for the National Anthem". Now, whether this practice of playing the National Anthem before the movie starts is right or wrong is a very different debate altogether. Let me not argue that. I accept that National Anthem be played right before you want to be entertained and your heart be filled with patriotism. BUT, do it right! I don't deny that the video is brilliantly made and is very compelling, and features some of the greatest artists India has ever produced (video embedded with this post). BUT, my concept of "National Anthem" is different. I want to be able to sing along, and I want to be able to sing it out loud, with my head held high, alongwith everyone else present there, and be proud. Not only will you find this rendition of the National Anthem to be totally un-sing-along-able, you will find no-one else present there humming the anthem with you! What. A. Shame. And to add insult to injury, Asha Bhosle adds a fourth 'jaya he' to the second last line of the anthem! And to everyone's disgrace, while the government mandates that the rendition of the National Anthem should be 52 seconds long, this video goes on for approximately 120 seconds! Hadd.

As a common man, may I ask just one thing. That next time you are some place, any place, and the National Anthem plays, please sing along, or at least try. That will make you proud, and make me proud.




Proud to be an Indian...

Memory/memories

Thud. Whoosh. Sprinkle, sprinkle, sprinkle. Everyday. Every freakin' day. This gardener would turn on the tap, and I would go round and round and round, and sprinkle and sprinkle and sprinkle. You know, when I was young, I was happy, happy happy, every freakin' day. And then, I got bored of being happy happy, and then it was me, just me, sitting here, doing my routine job, and well, being bored.

Today is different. I don't know why. You know, there is something about today. It's bright, it's sunny, and there is lush green grass all around me. And, I know that the lush green grass would not have been there if it was not for me! Yeah! I should have been proud all this time. I don't know why, but I kind-of feel over-whelmed today. And, I am smiling!

You know, a thought struck me today. The water, the water that I sprinkle all around, they are so joyous. They have always been. Every single day. Without exception. They would gleefully fly through the air into the grass, and make it green, lush, and fresh! And then I got thinking, what made them so happy? Maybe, just maybe, it was their lack of memory. They would travel all over the world, in clouds, in rains, in bottles, in drains, what not! But these, the ones right here, they are here from God-knows-where, but now they are here, all fresh and sparkling, and, happy. Probably because they don't remember what they have gone through. But they know they are here right now, and that now is awesome, and that makes them happy. Ha, but they wouldn't remember this later. What's the point you ask? At least they are happy now. :)

I have had a long life. Yes, I was young and happy once. Every day was a joy. Now all there is are memories. Good and bad. Sometimes, I feel, it would be so nice if the bad memories went away, just like that. Sometimes I wish I don't remember anything at all. Then, I think, maybe that's what makes me me, thats what makes me unique. Maybe thats the way it was meant to be.

I think I know why I feel this way today. This girl, standing there amidst the crowd that never acknowledges me, she has been looking at me. And she is smiling :) Yeah, for the past half-an-hour, she has just been standing there, and has been looking at me. And she smiles when she feels that occasional spray on her face. She is enjoying it! Haha, let me play with her! It feels awesome. Yeah. You know, I can see the wonder on her face when she gets to see that occasional rainbow in the spray of the water. Awesome! Yeah, today is different. This girl made it different for me. Ah, a memory to cherish this shall be...

...there's such a lot of world to see.